Episode 14: Seminar in Sonomancy

[SCENE 1 - Jenna’s suite]

JENNA: Ellie!

ELLIE: Oh, hi Jenna. Hi Pem.

JENNA: Wait, seriously? Oh hi? That’s all I’m getting?

ELLIE: How was detention?

JENNA: How was detention? I was- I was trapped 400 years in the past for days-

PEM: Well, from our perspective it was only like six hours. But still, Ellie, given how worried you were about her, this reaction from you is strange.

ELLIE: I’m sorry, what? 400 years in the past, I don’t - I don’t know what you’re talking about. Devon and I were carrying those horrible bookshelves and then- um. And then… wait, weird? I remember walking down the hallway to the library and then… It’s all very fuzzy. I think I got back to the dorm somehow and took a nap? And like, I just woke up.

PEM: You and Devon saw Brynn and Jenna get sucked into that portal. You’re really telling me you don’t remember?

ELLIE: I… don’t, I ‘m sorry. But I’m glad you’re okay. A portal, wow. That’s… crazy. That’s like really powerful magic. And… did you say four hundred years? That shouldn’t be possible.

JENNA: Ellie, I was there.

PEM: It was a very unusual and fascinating set of circumstances. Dr. Ungala is going to write a paper about it.

ELLIE: Who?

PEM: Oh, uh Dr. Ungala, the foremost thaumalogist in the entire empire, who I got to meet and help out, sorry I’m just really geeking out about this. But Jenna actually time-traveled, so her story is probably more interesting.

ELLIE: Okay, okay. Deep breaths Pem. Also, uh, deep breaths me? Can we sit down? This feels like a lot.

[Opening credits music]

CREDITS: Electromancy, episode 14- Seminar in Sonomancy

JENNA: So yeah. That’s the short version I guess.

ELLIE: That’s intense.

PEM: Can we go back to the mana batteries? You’re sure he said necromancy? I’m just considering the theoretical implications of-

JENNA: I watched a good man die, Pem. I wasn’t… worried about exactly how the horrible atrocity works.

PEM: I’m - I’m sorry. It’s just, exactly how one makes a mana battery has always been this big secret, and-

JENNA: Because they have to be alive when they take the magic, Pem. And they’re not alive any more when it's over. And now I think we know what happens to the students who get sent away.

ELLIE: You really think that? I mean, you really think they’re taking children and-

PEM: Actually, children probably work better.

ELLIE: What?

PEM: I mean, I don’t know, but it would make sense. The younger a mage, the more of their magic energy is stored as-

JENNA: Pem, can you please not be a scientist right now?

PEM: Okay, I’m sorry.

[beat]

JENNA: You know what, we’ve all had long days apparently. Let’s get some sleep and - try and figure this all out in the morning.

[SCENE 2: THE DEAN’s OFFICE]

DEAN: General? To what do I owe the pleasure?

VELD: We’ve finished up our work with the wards. Should be stronger than ever now. Though considerable power reserves have been expended. Worth it, of course. In some ways, this school is our most valuable military resource.

DEAN: I quite agree, though it isn’t only that…

VELD: I just stopped in to check in with you. I’m hearing way too much about the goings-on here. I should only hear things when it's time for graduation. Other than that it should be “the students are coming along nicely.”

DEAN: Ideally, yes.

VELD: These two mages we’ve just saved- Tessek, and Donovan. I need to know - are they worth the trouble?

DEAN: You’ve seen their files. They’re prodigies, both of them.

VELD: That’s not what I was asking. Are they loyal? Will you and your people be able to mold them into good soldiers?

DEAN: Tessek is a troublemaker, but I don’t believe she’s a traitor. As for Donovan, she’s only just arrived. There hasn’t been time-

VELD: That’s precisely the problem. She’s had a lot of time to develop her own way of thinking. I won’t lie to you, I need an Electromancer of her abilities. And if half the reports about this Tessek are true, an illusionist of her caliber could make an incredible field agent. But therein, of course, lies the danger as well.

You need to consider your position very carefully. A powerful mage is like any powerful weapon- we must ask ourselves if the opportunity to wield it is worth the risk it will be used against us. You know your students, so that’s your question to answer. But think long and hard before you do. A lot depends on whether or not you get it right.

DEAN: Of course sir. I am fully aware of my responsibility as head of this institution.

VELD: Well. If you change your mind about either of them, you know where to find me. My agent will remain until she is satisfied that the school is secure. Please make sure everyone cooperates with her investigation.

[SCENE 3 - the cafeteria.]

BRYNN: Hey! Over here! Saved you a seat.

JENNA: Oh, uh hi. Um, I usually eat with-

BRYNN: Oh, I see how it is. Happy to hang with me when we’re imprisoned by evil necromancers in the distant past, but once I save your ass it’s back to the cool kids’ table.

JENNA: To be fair, I didn’t have any choice but to hang out with you then. That’s what “imprisoned” means.

BRYNN: Ok, yeah, but- I thought we were going to try and put our past behind us. Sisters, remember? Forged in fire?

JENNA: We’re not… that. But fine. I’ll have lunch with you I guess.

BRYNN: Oh man, I feel so honored.

JENNA: Where’s Devon?

BRYNN: Getting more tater tots. Boy loves him some tots.

PEM: Hi Jenna. Hi Brynn. Wait. Wait, what are you two doing eating together? Are you friends now? Are we all friends now?

[Simultaneously]

BRYNN: Yes.

JENNA: No.

BRYNN: We are, she just isn’t ready to admit it yet.

PEM: Oh. Um, I’m not going to try and figure out this dynamic right now, if that’s okay? Just going to hope I can keep being friends with both of you and that’s my dilemma resolved.

JENNA: What dilemma?

PEM: Just that I like both of you, a lot, as people I mean, not romantically- and I wasn’t sure that was allowed while you hated each other. That’s still probably something I need to figure out, but if you don’t hate each other anymore, then, well, it drops in priority.

BRYNN: I missed you, Pem.

JENNA: It was like two days. But I.. missed you too.

[transition]

ELLIE: Devon! Hey!

DEVON: Hey, Ellie. I was just gonna try and get some more tater tots. Have you eaten yet?

ELLIE: Uh, no, but - serious question. What do you remember about yesterday?

DEVON: We had detention together. We carried some bookshelves, you objectified me, then told me I had a crush on Lucas Burns, which I do not, and then-

ELLIE: And then?

DEVON: Wow, there is, like, a whole chunk of the day unaccounted for. Something happened with Jenna and Brynn? I- we- were worried about them. It’s so fuzzy. How have I not noticed this?

ELLIE: So, we got our memories messed with.

DEVON: Obviously it was a rush job. Didn’t even have time to fill in the gap with fake ones.

ELLIE: Uh, they can do that?

DEVON: I mean, psychomancers can. Sonomancers can also mess with memory, but it’s less precise I think? I don’t really know. Actually umbrancers can do it a little bit too. Like Rain.

ELLIE: Should we, like, tell someone? Like Bruce? It’s really freaking me out to not know what happened in those hours.

DEVON: Sure. Let’s go together after breakfast.

ELLIE: Wow.

DEVON: What?

ELLIE: Um, Jenna and Brynn are eating together. What is happening to the universe?

DEVON: Hey.

BRYNN: Hey. You really loaded up.

DEVON: Oh, you know. Carbs. Good… energy.

BRYNN: Mm-hmm. Sure. Have a seat.

ELLIE: Are we, like, all friends now?

JENNA: Let’s settle for “no longer nemeses”, okay?

BRYNN: I mean, we can still be nemeses if you want. Having a nemesis is cool.

JENNA: You’re a very strange girl.

DEVON: She grows on you.

JENNA: We’ll see.

[awkward silence]

ELLIE: Okay, so this is, like, several different kinds of weird, right?

JENNA: Given the weekend we’ve had, I guess nothing really feels weird anymore.

BRYNN: Okay, but like, now that I’m home and safe and definitely not going to die, I’m kind of starting to think that was the coolest weekend ever?

JENNA: Are you serious?

BRYNN: Kinda, yeah. You were just zapping dudes left and right and not even having to feel bad about it cause they were clearly evil-

JENNA: They weren’t necessarily evil. And I did feel bad about it.

BRYNN: But it was totally justified. And look- you didn’t alter the present! I mean, I don’t think you did. Tater tots still got invented. Ellie seems fine, you definitely didn’t kill her ancestor like you were worried about.

JENNA: I really don’t like hurting people.

How many people can say they’ve been to the past and kicked ass there?

JENNA: I just don’t see how you can be so… cavalier about this. What about Cabe?

BRYNN: Cabe was a great dude who died 400 years ago. And if we hadn’t been there? He still would have died 400 years ago. Probably. Maybe he would have died a few years later, but he’d be just as dead right now. So I’m trying not to be too sad about it.

JENNA: Let’s… talk about something else. Pem, you had an exciting day, I heard?

PEM: Um, exciting for me, yes, and I’m bursting to talk about it, but I’m pretty sure it’ll be super boring to you guys. It’s all, like, theoretical thaumaturgical stuff and I know that’s kind of only interesting to me.

DEVON: I like it when you geek out about this stuff, Pem.

PEM: You’re just saying that.

DEVON: I’m not. I like seeing you passionate about something.

PEM: And the rest of you-

ELLIE: Oh, anything to make this less awkward.

PEM: Okay, well, you see the wards dissipate spell energy, so anyone who tries to cast a spell within them it just kind of fizzles. But magic has two major components- the power and the will, right? So the will is what shapes the spell to the caster’s whim, and Dr. Ungala believes that the ward was actually trapping a significant portion of that power every time a spell fizzled. So, when Cyrus tried to use Chronomancy as the wards were collapsing because of the creature it imposed the will of his defensive spell over all of the magic trapped in the wards, creating this massive time portal… [fade out]

[SCENE 4 - Bruce’s office]

[door opening]

BRUCE: Oh, you’re still here.

INVESTIGATOR: Of course I’m still here. That little incident with the portal distracted us from the work at hand; now it’s time to get back to it.

BRUCE: Little incident? Two students and a faculty member get sucked through a portal to God-knows-where-

INVESTIGATOR: God-knows-when, actually, as it turns out. But the students and Mr. Graves are recovered safely, and I am assured by Dr. Ungala that it was a freak accident, not a terrorist plot. So now we need to go back to unraveling the actual terrorist plot, by which I mean the monster whose banishment we both participated two nights ago. And, as incompetent as you are, I am under instructions to utilize your knowledge of the school and its population. So use you I will.

BRUCE: Just like old times, eh, Marina?

MARINA: Don’t call me that. It won’t be anything like “old times”, Mr. McCray. You’ve chosen your path, I’ve chosen mine. That they are intersecting for little while is nothing more than a whim of fate. Now. I want to talk to you about your colleague, Dr. Sumner. His participation in last night's events doesn’t add up, and before we confront him I want to make sure we know everything that we can.

[we hear a knock]

BRUCE: I should answer that.

MARINA: We weren’t finished.

BRUCE: And this could be important. This is my office, I’ll decide when to open the door.

[he opens the door.]

BRUCE: Ellie. Devon. What can I do for you?

MARINA: Can this wait? We were in the middle of-

BRUCE: Hey, now. These two were pretty heavily involved in the… incident. Let’s hear what they have to say. It might be relevant.

[deep sigh from Marina.]

BRUCE: Come in.

ELLIE: We- we had something to report. But- does she have to be here?

DEVON: It’s okay, Ellie.

MARINA: If it concerns recent events I’m afraid I should be present, I’m still heading up this investigation.

BRUCE: If you’d rather talk to just me, I’m happy to ask the Investigator to step outside.

ELLIE: No, it’s… fine, I guess. Um, so Devon and I were in detention yesterday-

MARINA: Yes, you reported the portal… situation.

DEVON: That’s the thing. Everyone says we did, but we don’t remember it. Or I do a little, but it’s really vague.

ELLIE: Yeah, we’re missing several hours from yesterday.

MARINA: Memory manipulation.

BRUCE: Cyrus got his mind messed with too, the night that creature appeared.

MARINA: Yes. Dean Ventrassi had no success recovering the missing memories. Tell us everything you do remember. Maybe whoever did this left some kind of clue behind. Mr. Lancook, you mentioned a vague recollection?

DEVON: Just- I remember being worried about Brynn. And I had an idea- some sort of idea about where she might be. So I went to go talk to… someone about it. But I don’t know who. Or what the idea was.

BRUCE: And Ellie, you don’t remember the portal at all?

ELLIE: Um, I remember being in detention with Devon, walking down the hallway towards the library, and then I remember waking up in my bed a few minutes before Jenna and Pem walked in.

MARINA: After Ms. Donovan returned from the past.

ELLIE: I guess, yeah.

BRUCE: So the total amount of time unaccounted for was… about six hours? And you, Devon, you remember that time better?

DEVON: A little better I guess. I have vague emotional impressions, but no details.

MARINA: Do you remember anyone you were with?

DEVON: Ellie. But that’s no help…

ELLIE: Wait- there was… there was someone else. Um, Lucas, uh-

DEVON: We saw Lucas before my memories start getting foggy.

ELLIE: But- wait, I- never mind.

BRUCE: Go to the medical wing and get checked out. It’s possible Tomas will be able to figure out more about what happened using biomancy. Let us know if you remember anything and we’ll let you know if we find anything out.

DEVON: Okay.

ELLIE: Okay, yeah, that makes sense.

BRUCE: Most likely you both just overheard something you weren’t meant to overhear. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Almost every time someone gets a mind-wipe that’s the reason. Whoever it was probably just took extra time because they were in a hurry. It’s good to be safe. And you said you woke up in your own bed, Ellie? Someone must have seen you enter the common room, or at least walking along the bridge. They might be able to narrow down when the wipe happened. There’s a good chance you spent most of those six hours sleeping.

We’ll get to the bottom of this. Just try and relax. It’s gonna be okay.

ELLIE: Thanks, Mr. McCray.

[they leave]

MARINA: Dr. Sumner has the ability to manipulate memories. And Devon was with him in the tunnels. We need to speak to him immediately.

BRUCE: We need to retrace the students’ steps first. Construct a timeline for the missing hours. Whoever did this is probably the same person who summoned the creature, we need to close in on-

MARINA: I’m telling you, we have an obvious suspect!

BRUCE: And I’m telling you Leonard wouldn’t hurt a kid! Not even through negligence.

[beat.]

MARINA: (regaining her composure) This was always your problem Bruce. You get too close to people. Remember back in Volar, that village- what was it called? Tarel-something?

BRUCE: We’re not going to talk about old times, Marina.

MARINA: I told you to address me as “Investigator”.

BRUCE: Then you should call me “Mr. McCray.” We haven’t been friends in a long time.

MARINA: Obviously. But the fact remains, you’re too soft. Always have been. I’m sure it suits you better here, working with children, than it did when we were partners. Just don’t forget that these children are also irreplaceable weapons. Because I guarantee you that’s something our enemies won’t forget for a second.

[SCENE 5- a crowded hallway]

BRYNN: Hi again.

JENNA: (annoyed) Hi Brynn.

BRYNN: Walk with me?

JENNA: Why are you so determined to make us friends suddenly?

BRYNN: Because I was wrong about you, okay? And… it turns out we want the same things.

JENNA: And what things would that be?

BRYNN: Things we definitely don’t want to talk about out loud in a crowded hallway.

[beat]

BRYNN: C’mon. What can I do to make it up to you?

JENNA: You could tell Mr. Collins what you did and get him to let me take my sight-reading test again.

BRYNN: You really want to be in the orchestra? Don’t you want to learn stuff that’s going to help you? When… shit gets real.

JENNA: That’s not who I am, Brynn. I’m not a - co-conspirator. I’m just a girl trying to make the best of a bad situation. Music calms me. Sometimes it's the only thing that lets me feel okay about everything. You took that. You want to make amends, make them. And accept the consequences of what you did.

BRYNN: Yeah, so “accepting the consequences of my actions” is really not the kind of person I am. If you haven’t noticed.

JENNA: You asked what you could do to make things right between us. I told you. You don’t like it, we can go back to being enemies. Or strangers! Strangers would be great.

BRYNN: No, it wouldn’t! We’ve been to the past together. I’m never going to have anyone else who understands that- or who even believes me, I don’t know. We can’t go back to strangers after that.

JENNA: Enemies then. Or friends. It’s entirely your choice. Let me know when you make up your mind. I’m going this way.

[SCENE 6 - The Medical Wing]

TOMAS: Well, the good news is, you’re fine, Ms. Francis. Whatever happened to you in that time, you weren’t physically injured. I can look at you like the mundanes do as well if it’ll make you feel better, but the magical way is just as reliable if not more so. And a lot less invasive.

ELLIE: No, that’s fine, Tomas. Thanks. I, um, trust magic more. What’s the bad news?

TOMAS: I can’t recover those memories, or even tell what kind of spell wiped them out. It was a long shot, though.

ELLIE: Okay, well. Thanks for trying.

TOMAS: You did a fine job the other night, Ms. Francis.

ELLIE: In the caves? I didn’t really do anything...

TOMAS: Nonsense. You got me there safely and helped me tend to the injured students. You were invaluable.

ELLIE: Well. You’re welcome.

TOMAS: You know sometimes low-level Electromancers are lent out to the medical core. You’re useful for restarting hearts and- other things. Something to consider, in a few years. Could be a good fit.

ELLIE: I’ll - uh, I’ll think about it. I should go.

TOMAS: Try not to over-exert yourself.

ELLIE: I won’t, thanks. Devon, hey. You all good?

DEVON: Apparently. I’m going to head back to- who’s that?

[footsteps]

ELLIE: Justin? What are you doing here?

[a few seconds of silence]

ELLIE: Ok, slow down please. I can’t understand you when you sign that fast, I keep missing things.

[a few more seconds of silence]

DEVON: Translate? Please?

ELLIE: Normally I would but believe me you don’t want any of this being said out loud. [beat] Ok, screw math class. We need to find Mr. McCray again now. Wait, no. We need to- Devon, let’s find some place private we can talk, okay?

[more footsteps] [door opens and closes]

ELLIE: Okay, Justin told me you thought Professor Sumner had made the portal and abducted Jenna and Brynn? He says he knocked us out somehow.

DEVON: Who is Justin?

ELLIE: My brother!

DEVON: That was that kid? And he was with us? How did his memory not get wiped?

ELLIE: Sonomancy! Doesn’t work if you can’t hear it. Apparently that was my brilliant plan.

DEVON: We should tell Bruce.

ELLIE: That was my first thought. Then I thought, why didn’t we go to him in the first place instead of confronting Leonard ourselves?

DEVON: I don’t know. I don’t know why I thought he would have abducted anyone, that doesn’t make any sense. Did we tell your brother?

ELLIE: He says you insisted you had good evidence, but that you wouldn’t tell any of us where you got it.

DEVON: Well that doesn’t make any sense.

ELLIE: No, it doesn’t, but, like, if you had some reason for not telling us what you know and not going to Mr. McCray in the first place, then it's probably something that would get you in, like, really big trouble, which might be a reason not to tell any teachers about it now.

DEVON: Whatever it was, he must have wiped it from my memory when he wiped the afternoon. But maybe I told Brynn about it before she disappeared. I tell her pretty much everything. I’ll find her, and see if she knows what I knew.

ELLIE: What should I do?

DEVON: Just sit tight. I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.

[SCENE 7- Leonard’s office]

LEONARD: Come in!

MARINA: Dr. Sumner. We need to talk.

LEONARD: I wondered when you’d get to around to me.

BRUCE: I’m sorry. I told her you had nothing to do with this, but she wouldn’t take my word for it.

LEONARD: As well she shouldn’t have. Leave no stone unturned. How can I help the investigation?

MARINA: What were you doing in the catacombs Friday night?

LEONARD: Same thing as you. Trying to stop the creature.

BRUCE: Why though? It wasn’t your job.

LEONARD: I was thinking about the details of the investigation you’d shared with me, and I realized what the creature was. An obscure, extraplanar being that feeds on magic- and I realized it must be after the battery. I went to warn you. But before I could find you, I ran into Tessek and Lancook. Obviously, I had to make sure they got back safely.

MARINA: You couldn’t have warned us by phone? Or found a telepath?

LEONARD: I didn’t have your number! And I figured Bruce probably wouldn’t pick up if he was in animal form. And it honestly didn’t even occur to me to find a telepath.

MARINA: Just slipped your mind?

LEONARD: I’m not proud of it. But I panicked.

MARINA: Where did Brynn Tessek get a banishing scroll?

LEONARD: I assume she took it off me when I was incapacitated.

BRUCE: Where did you get it? That’s a hell of a specific thing to have lying around.

LEONARD: Look behind me, Bruce. What do you see?

BRUCE: A whole bunch of scrolls.

LEONARD: I’m a thaumaturgist, of course I have a variety of scrolls and wands on hand. There’s nothing illegal in it. I need them for my research.

MARINA: I wasn’t aware you were still doing much research, you have a full course load.

BRUCE: It’s not something I’ve ever heard you mention.

LEONARD: It would bore you. So I don’t.

MARINA: Where did you get them?

LEONARD: Sometimes I buy them. Usually I trade sonomancy scrolls for them. I make the sonomancy scrolls myself. This is irrelevant. I knew what I thought the creature was, I had what I needed- which was, by the way, a generic banishing scroll, containing one spell to send any extraplanar creature back to its plane of origin, not an especially esoteric thing to have- so I went to find you, to assist you. I ran into a pair of students and decided I needed to shepherd them home first. Then the creature found us. We were trying to banish it when the rest of the students arrived, and you know the rest.

BRUCE: We’ll see how your story lines up with everyone else’s.

MARINA: Don’t leave the campus until we tell you you can, or you’ll be considered a fugitive.

BRUCE: Oh, c’mon. That’s a little harsh-

MARINA: It’s necessary. If it were up to me I’d reinstate the old dungeon and lock you in it. Fortunately for you, the Dean has vetoed that. But I’ve got my eye on you, doctor.

[SCENE 8 - Electromancy Common Room]

[electric zap and door opening]

JENNA: Ellie! Where have you been?

ELLIE: It is a long story that I will tell you once I know how it ends. And also how the middle goes.

JENNA: Is everything okay?

ELLIE: I think so. Way more okay than it was this morning anyway. Where’s Pem?

JENNA: In their room, I think. They’re pretty exhausted.

ELLIE: I’m surprised you’re not.

JENNA: I am. I’ve been resting most of the day.

ELLIE: Oh, yeah. Um. Jenna, I… I owe you an apology. Um. For everything I said to you on Friday. You were just looking out for me, and I took it way too personally, and… um, you were right, and I’m sorry.

JENNA: Oh gods. That feels like a year ago. It’s fine Ellie. I should have chosen my words… a lot more carefully.

ELLIE: Are we friends again?

JENNA: Of course.

ELLIE: Ok, good. Are you friends with Brynn now?

JENNA: She thinks so.

ELLIE: What do you think?

JENNA: We’ll see.

ELLIE: Okay, cause that breakfast? Was awkward as hell.

JENNA: Heh. Yeah. Are you sure you don’t want to talk about… whatever is happening with you?

ELLIE: Uh, I’d rather talk about literally anything else so I don’t stress about it while I can’t do anything about it. Well, maybe not literally anything else- um, I’ve had my fill of thaumaturgical theory, sorry Pem, but, you know. Can we talk about normal stuff?

JENNA: Sure. I like normal stuff.

ELLIE: Great, because there’s a dance coming up in a couple weeks- which is, like our fall formal, or whatever- and I thought it might be fun to go.

JENNA: Dances were never really my thing.

ELLIE: Well, I’m gonna go. I don’t have a boyfriend right now, and I don’t want to go by myself cause that’s pathetic, so I thought maybe you and Pem would come, just like a girl group - well, Pem’s not a girl I know, but - just like three friends, you know? Like a friend group? Three friends you know?

JENNA: I don’t have a dress.

ELLIE: Oh, we can get you a dress.

JENNA: I’ll think about it.

ELLIE: Think about it!

[gossip grooving plays]

CREDITS: Closing: Electromancy is written, produced and directed by Nathan Comstock. This episode was sound designed by Nathan Comstock with music by Thomas Dwyer. It starred Azul Nova as Jenna, Austin Hendricks as Ellie, Sena Bryer as Pem, Leslie Gideon as Brynn, Tuesday Orion Ibert as Devon, Deja Scott as Marina, Joe Kearney as Bruce, Zachary Robb as Dr. Sumner, and Nathan Comstock as Tomas. Jason Cryer appears in the tag. Thanks for joining us again for season 2, and thanks to everyone who contributed to our crowdfunding campaign to make this show happen. This episode, we’d like to offer a special thanks to Jason Schneider. Jason, your support genuinely means a lot. You can find out more about us at www.electromancypod.com. We’ll be back with another episode in 2 weeks, and stay tuned for a trailer for another show you’ll love, after the tag.

[SCENE 9: A PHONE CALL]

MR. LANCOOK: And that’s all you know?

TOMAS: All I know for sure, m’lord. But for what it’s worth, your son handled himself very well. I saw him fighting off the creature with his ice magic-

MR. LANCOOK: I’m glad my son handled himself well, Tomas, but he should never have been put in that position. Thank you for the intel.

[phone hanging up noise.]

MR. LANCOOK: Jenkins, ready my car! We’re going to the Institute!

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MADISON: Toto! I gotta get that dog into an obedience class” (Wizard of Oz)

MADISON: Really diggin’ Dracula’s OG goth style” (Dracula)

MADISON: What if I killed freakin’ Sherlock Holmes??” (Sherlock 1)

ANNOUNCER: And many more! Actual old time radio scripts adapted. It’s like if the MST3K/Riff Trax guys were in the movies they riff. Start at the beginning, or jump around to any title that grabs you. New episodes premiere the first of every month. Find us wherever you get your podcasts.